Assalamualaikum pembuka bicara.... (cehhhhh...!! Dan2 ehhhh 😂)
Salam ramadhan kareem, salam kerajaan baru,
So it’s finally Ramadhan eh.. alhamdulillah, I’m still given the chance by Allah to enter this holy month.. tho i knew I’m damn bad as a Muslim, a great sinner and InsyaAllah a repenter..
Allahuakbar.. Allahuakbar.. Allahuakbar..
He is indeed the best planner..
So i quit my old job, in Hirose (M) at Shah Alam.. the job that I’ve been for 2months+ only..
to a better one.. to where I belong, to TNB REMACO (CSM).
Alhamdulillah for this gift, I was truly amazed on what He planned for me. There’s hikmah for everything, I’m definitely feeling happier here, definitely enjoying myself more.. alhamdulillah, thank you, Allah SWT.
So here’s my journey,
Hirose (M): started job on 28/12/2017 until 9/3/2018
TNB REMACO (CSM) : started on 12/03/2018 til now
I love it here. I’m loved by people.. I have my abg with me, whom I can totally rely on.. love you, abg... to the moon and back 🙆🏼♀️
I love my job, I love the environment, dun really care bout the girls, ( sikit je pun in comparison with Hirose’s).. Alhamdulillah... I’m so thankful.
Him, the one that shouldn’t be said his name, the you-know-who, already engaged when I were still in Hirose, I was backstabbed, humiliated, lied on, cheated with and other related term by the-you-know-who. I was in grief for months, I wasn’t myself, I’ve thought of doing stupid stuff like jumping down my apartment, just to see either I can die oe not, I’ve thought of eating pills and bring myself to sleep.. I’ve thought of using a knife to end my life, I’ve thought of things... things that I didn’t usually think of..things that wani never think off.. various, stupid, devastated choice just to make me feel at ease.. but alhamdulillah, i managed to go thru that.. I managed to bring myself home, I managed to hold my thoughts.
I cried to Jauhara, one fine night, since I’m like out of myself.. I can’t contain this anymore.. so i cried and cried and cried myself out for 3hrs plus, until I choke my own tears, I’m short of breath, until i think somehow I drove myself to sleep, that night.. joe was there, can’t do anything, unable to give me the right word, kinda glued looking at my shabby, teary face, with drowning eyes..(we were facetiming coz she insisted to look at me, mybe kinda afraid I’m gonna do something stupid or what).. so yeah, joe stayed the whole night, hearing my though on the you-know-who was like, but instead he’s just a stupid guy with stupid attitude and asshole, dóuchbag, shitty, little thing...and I’ve decided not to make me feel stupid, in which is being in his par.. so I decided to become stronger, and be me..and not that asshole...
And here I am, everything happened for a reason. I believe I was put in Hirose just so that I’m closer to him and I can see how stupid he is or whatever... and I believe I was put here in REMACO to forget bout that asshole, to have a new life, to be with people who love me, to feel love and be happy.. coz I certainly need them.. gosh, teruknya english hahahaha.. but nvm, it has been so long since then..
For you asshole, live well in hell, coz I ain’t forgiving you.. may you be in pain coz trying to be happy when you dumped me like i was once nothing for you..like we didn’t share anything.. like we’ve never met before, like strangers..
People may said that it’s better to forgive and forget.. but for me, let time decides, for now, I ain’t forgiving you..but I’m slowly but surely trying to forget you.. and InsyaAllah it’s working.. but I surely hope you’re somewhere being stupid and unsuccessful and asshole and shitty and i hope nothing works for you.. hahhahahaha.. I’m ur bitch remember.. 💁🏼♀️
So I’m done cursing the you-know-who, adios amigos..
Kind regards,
Syazwani.
23:47, 6 Ramadhan 1439AH.
